I’ve been sat here at my desk crying nearly all morning. 

49 people shot dead at two mosques in Christchurch, New Zealand with at least 20 more injured. 

I’ve never been to New Zealand. 
It’s the other side of the world to me 
But it may as well be right here in my village, it feels so frightening and horrific. 
The atrocities have been live-streamed on social media. 
The local schools were locked down #ourchildren
We have to unite. 
Because it’s all the same heartbreak. 
We’re all the one person. 
We share the “darkest days”
We all want to give and receive love, surely?
It is essential to our survival as a species. 
We’re meant to look after each other. 
So why?

As Maya Angelou said

Hate. It has caused a lot of problems in the world, but has not solved one yet.

I don’t really know what I”m trying to say. 
Perhaps that’s why I can’t stop crying. Trying to unblock my throat. 

I often get told “you’re too deep…stop overthinking things….stop worrying about stuff you can’t change”. But I can’t close my heart over. And it’s my heart which feels this deep pain of loss today. 
We must not lose heart in the face of hatred. 
Division comes from fear. 
When we stand in love, there is no space between us. 
When we stand in fear, the space becomes a black hole of hate.
You have to choose, especially on days like this. 

So I’ll just keep trying with where I am. 
Small acts of kindness each day. 
Helping people where I can. 
Standing up for what I believe in. 
Spreading ripples to help people grow through pain and adversity. 
I’ve heard it said that the great spiritual leaders of our time are not [just] the ones who are famous. 

They’re the unsung heroes within our communities. 
The ones doing the small things with love. 
The ones who teach our children how to care, how to keep caring, how to strive for compassion and create great things from within. 
The ones who are quietly powerful and may not be recognised or celebrated publicly in the every day, but their work and their hearts are pure and necessary. 

Can we all be that person?
Because that would help, wouldn’t it? Just by virtue of sheer numbers. 

There are atrocities everywhere, every day, some of them bigger than others. 
We have to keep believing that humans are inherently good. That the world is inherently a beautiful place. 
Can we keep united to keep turning against the wave of hate in whatever big or small way we can?
Can we keep asking WHY? Not just to try and understand, but to make sure it’s spoken about and not ignored or accepted or met with indifference. 
It matters. Life matters. 
Today matters. 


P.S. Here’s a photo of a rainbow I saw just over the fields this morning, before I read the news online. There’ve been rainbows everywhere this week in the UK. Why? Perhaps to remind us to stay colourful and beautiful, at all times. No matter what storms approach or threaten or consume us. We hope and strive for better. My heart is with the bereaved families and the people #newzealand across this rainbow today

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